by Sandra Rose Hughes

Sometimes I can’t tell-
Am I the evil-doer?
Set ablaze,
Left with neither root nor branches?
Burning up with the chaff?
How else can I explain my Lord’s inaction?
My Lord’s silence?

Why don’t you heal my father,
The root of my tree?
I have prayed.
I have fasted.
Still, he withers.
Still, he weakens,
He wastes away.

Why doesn’t the Sun of Righteousness
Rise with healing on His wings
For my father, His servant,
Who has crushed evil underfoot in His name?

If not for my sake,
(For my prayers seem to have gone unheard,)
Then for his own-
Surely he has served worthily enough
To be granted healing?

Surely he has given enough
To allow his joy to return,
His energy to return,
To let him kick his heels once again
Like a calf released from the stall?

At least heal him so he can continue
To crush evil into ashes in Your name.
You have the power, Lord of Armies,
Jehovah Rapha,
Why don’t you heal him?

Oh Lord Jesus, come soon;
I am so tired of losing those I love.

My family is currently walking through a painful season because of my father’s poor health. God has answered my prayers faithfully and often in the past, so I find it frustrating and strange that He is not answering “yes” to my prayers for healing for my father, a long-time faithful Christian, at this time. Micah 4:1-3 is full of the rich promises of God that are “Yes” in Christ Jesus, but as I meditated on this scripture, I began to write about the experience of being in a waiting place, and feeling the anguish that all Christians struggle through when God does not answer His promises in a way that is evident to us (yet.)